question 194

Q. Is the glass half full or half empty?

A. Neither. the glass is 95% filled with ice, which costs the establishment nothing to make, and is 5% filled with the liquid you ordered.

question 193

Q. Is there such a thing as Reincarnation?

A. We had better hope so, given the waiting times in the Health System...

question 192

Q. Do today's computer obsessed youngsters have any idea of their history - for instance, how many internet junkies know who was the French commander at the Battle of the Plains of Abraham?

A. Easy, Mont.com

question 191

Q. Why did the fish cross the road?

A. On Fridays he does the old Catholic neighborhoods for the chicken...

question 190

Q. Why are Basenjis called 'Dog convertibles'?

A. Because they are roof-less.

question 189

Q. Why did Oedipus cross the road?

A. To get to the mother side....

question 188

Q. What do kettles, mermaids, and union members have in common?

A. They all have scale.

question 187

Q. In George Orwell's book "Animal Farm", what did the phrase "Two legs bad, four legs good" refer to?

A. Table design.

question 186

Q. Why did all the snowmen cross the road?

A. Because Vanoc was herding them up to the barren slopes of the Olympic events.

question 185

Q. Why did Napoleon keep putting his hand inside his jacket?

A. He was checking to see if the ipod had been invented yet.

question 184

Q. Are the minimalist, ultra-modern decorating schemes in magazines really very practical?

A. The trouble with all white walls, white furniture, and white carpeting, is that you never see the polar bear until it is too late....

question 183

Q. What happened on the most famous blind date of all time?

A. It turned out that Justice wasn't as blind as she was letting on....

question 182

Q. Why did the rooster not cross the road?

A. He didn't want anyone to think he was chicken.

question 181

Q. Why do elephants never forget?

A. Have you ever tried to tie a string around an elephant's toe?

question 180

Q. What does it mean when someone is running down the street carrying a torch?

A. If the people behind him are carrying pitchforks, they are hunting monsters, whereas if the people behind him are carrying guns, it's the Olympics.

question 179

Q. Are there any pickup lines that a guy shouldn't use over Christmas?

A. If you meet a shapely young woman wearing reindeer antlers, Do Not say "Nice Rack!"

question 178

Q. What operation are aging Boomers getting in order to feel young and cool?

A. "Hip" replacements.

question 177

Q. What will we find different about our life once we have a baby?

A. Before you have a baby, "disposable" means income....

question 176

Q. Why are there no penguins at the North Pole?

A. Because they taste like chicken, Ho Ho Ho....

question 175

Q. Why did Columbus cross 49th avenue in Vancouver?

A. he was absolutely, positively, certain without a doubt that this time he had actually discovered India....